It was a long day but a good one. The kids were amazing as usual. It is so funny now that they can open their eyes.. they each watch me while I am doing something with the other one. If I am changing Austin's diaper, Grace is watching and vice versa.. hilarious.. already competing for my attention.
Today was a huge milestone.. they tried what is called non-nutritive feeding and that means that I pump first and then they try to latch on without actually getting any milk. By the time I got them all situated, it had been a few hours since I had pumped and I had milk backing up but didn't think they would actually latch. Grace was first and she latched immediately! and she did GREAT!!!! She nursed off and on for 10 minutes, wow!! I am so proud of her bc she is tiny and she didn't give up at all. Being that Grace did so well, I thought for sure that Austin would reject it but he did the same thing.. latched right on. Apparently, that is not the norm for premmies so I am feeling super proud of my two little stars!
We were hoping that they would be transferred to open air cribs in the next few days but with the issues Grace has been dealing with in terms of her hematacrit (anemia), they think it will be next week. Regulating their temperatures takes energy and calories are burned so it would be safer to keep them in. Now that they are breastfeeding, they will burn even more energy. Today, her hematocrit was 26 which is down from last week..It should coincide with their gestational age of 33 and obviously isn't. Austin's is down now too which sucks but we did find out that Tom's blood is a match so we have the samples ready and waiting. They would each get a transfusion to help build their red blood cell count. We will know more over the next week..
Updates
Grace
She still weighs 4lbs. 7 oz. and her feedings are the same, 36ML but she is still gaining weight.. woo hoo! The events have really slowed down this week for Grace and she is down to just a few each day, huge improvement. She has grown too and is now 16 1/2", up 1/2" since she was born.
Austin
His feedings got increased today to 42ML! He is growing soo fast! He still weighs 4lbs. 13 oz. and is doing so well. He went an entire night without a single event.. and even now, he only has a few here and there and resolves them himself. Yay! He has grown in length to 17 3/4" - up from 16" at birth.
Something fun was that my cousin/sister, Kirsten came to visit us today. It was wonderful to see her again and catch up.. ;)) Family is so important right now and having her close by is very comforting to me. It was a successful day and I'm feeling really blessed for all of the positive steps we have been taking lately. Thank you God!
Much love to you all,
Erica and Tom
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Monday, January 30, 2012
Better Day
Today was great.. I got to see the kids and my best friends..so comforting. I was able to hold the kids for an hour together (w/ no events!), the girls came to visit and then we went to lunch. The twins were so cute, growing quickly and sleeping more peaceful than before. I never thought I would say that I love changing diapers but I do. They are so tiny and I love being able to do the basics each day for them. Some great news is that a nurse told me that the kids will probably be moved into open cribs soon. They are able to maintain their body temps for the most part and that is the main factor. I can't wait to graduate from the incubators!!
I also found out that we moved to bay 5 bc we graduated somewhat...we were moved to a bay with less sick babies. Woo hoo! We kept watching these babies coming in and out with heart, brain and lung surgeries. It was so scary and now things seem to be more peaceful in our new bay. I will take that happily..
Updates
Austin
He weighed 4lbs. 13 oz today and is on the same feedings.
Grace
She weighed 4lbs. 7oz. and has the same feedings well.
We find out Wed. morning if Grace's hematocrit is still low..news as it happens..
Much love to you all,
Erica and Tom
I also found out that we moved to bay 5 bc we graduated somewhat...we were moved to a bay with less sick babies. Woo hoo! We kept watching these babies coming in and out with heart, brain and lung surgeries. It was so scary and now things seem to be more peaceful in our new bay. I will take that happily..
Updates
Austin
He weighed 4lbs. 13 oz today and is on the same feedings.
Grace
She weighed 4lbs. 7oz. and has the same feedings well.
We find out Wed. morning if Grace's hematocrit is still low..news as it happens..
Much love to you all,
Erica and Tom
Sunday, January 29, 2012
Some good news and some not so great news..
Tom came in yesterday by himself and I watched Tommy. He loved every second and got his baby fix for the day. I'm here today and he will come later so we are tag teaming this weekend which works surprisingly well. We each get time with Tommy which is essential and time with the twins.
The good news is that Gracie gained more weight, well they both did actually. She is now 4 lbs 3 oz. and he is 4 lbs 10 oz! We are so excited about that.. Other good news is that I get try breast feeding tomorrow, woo hoo! We got moved to Bay 5 as well so we are nestling into our new home.
The not so good news is that Gracie is still tachycardic somewhat which means that she still has an elevated heart rate. Again, it can be from her caffeine but it can also be that she needs more red blood cells to help oxygenate her blood and tissue, organs, etc. Shelly, our lead ( and favorite ) nurse has told me not to worry though. There is a chance she will need a blood transfusion which is more like an infusion bc they won't be taking any blood out. It will likely be Tom's blood so that will be good. She said this is quite common in premmies and about half of the kids have one before they go home. It still scares me to death and I have to just suspend my fear and trust that Shelly is right, this could be just a minor hurdle. Grace has a blood test tomorrow so I will keep everyone updated.
We continue to be hopeful that they will get out before their due date and pray every night and day for them. I can't wait to see them again tomorrow.
Much love to you all,
Erica and Tom
The good news is that Gracie gained more weight, well they both did actually. She is now 4 lbs 3 oz. and he is 4 lbs 10 oz! We are so excited about that.. Other good news is that I get try breast feeding tomorrow, woo hoo! We got moved to Bay 5 as well so we are nestling into our new home.
The not so good news is that Gracie is still tachycardic somewhat which means that she still has an elevated heart rate. Again, it can be from her caffeine but it can also be that she needs more red blood cells to help oxygenate her blood and tissue, organs, etc. Shelly, our lead ( and favorite ) nurse has told me not to worry though. There is a chance she will need a blood transfusion which is more like an infusion bc they won't be taking any blood out. It will likely be Tom's blood so that will be good. She said this is quite common in premmies and about half of the kids have one before they go home. It still scares me to death and I have to just suspend my fear and trust that Shelly is right, this could be just a minor hurdle. Grace has a blood test tomorrow so I will keep everyone updated.
We continue to be hopeful that they will get out before their due date and pray every night and day for them. I can't wait to see them again tomorrow.
Much love to you all,
Erica and Tom
Friday, January 27, 2012
Peaceful.. Happy 33 Weeks!
Today was a much better experience with the kids.. thank the Lord! They are looking so much better without the nasal canulas and their faces are filling out now. I love how sweet their faces look .. so much easier to deal with.. less wires and more like my children. It is getting harder and harder for me to leave them each day. I was telling them that it was time for momma to leave and it brought me to tears. Just knowing that I have to leave them somewhere else every day makes me crazy. It's not right to not be with your kids, to not hold them and rock them to sleep each night. I am so grateful for what we have been blessed with, an NICU that can keep them going and I know it is best for them to be there. I will just never get used to this. The rollercoaster continues and although I am ok, I am more than a little overwhelmed.
On a lighter note, they were such good snugglers and I think my heart grew ten fold today. I fall more in love with them every day and I can't wait to get them to the next stage.. feeding! They had desats today but they were mainly associated with reflux and knowing that makes me more calm. One step at a time..
Updates
Austin
He is still on 38ML feedings and weighed in today at 2030 grams which is 4 lbs. 7.5 oz.! Go Austin Go!
Grace
She has been increased to 36ML feedings and weighed in at 1835 grams, which is 4 pounds!!! Woo Hoo!!!!
My mom is leaving tomorrow and I am a little panicked about that but am so eternally grateful for her selflessness, her calmness and unending support. She will be back later and I really look forward to that being when they are home. She has made an appearance in each stage of this journey - helping me cope.. and the final stage is coming in just a few short weeks so that makes me feel like our team is moving towards the finish line.
I have attached some black and white photos from yesterday.. hope you like. :)
On a lighter note, they were such good snugglers and I think my heart grew ten fold today. I fall more in love with them every day and I can't wait to get them to the next stage.. feeding! They had desats today but they were mainly associated with reflux and knowing that makes me more calm. One step at a time..
Updates
Austin
He is still on 38ML feedings and weighed in today at 2030 grams which is 4 lbs. 7.5 oz.! Go Austin Go!
Grace
She has been increased to 36ML feedings and weighed in at 1835 grams, which is 4 pounds!!! Woo Hoo!!!!
My mom is leaving tomorrow and I am a little panicked about that but am so eternally grateful for her selflessness, her calmness and unending support. She will be back later and I really look forward to that being when they are home. She has made an appearance in each stage of this journey - helping me cope.. and the final stage is coming in just a few short weeks so that makes me feel like our team is moving towards the finish line.
I have attached some black and white photos from yesterday.. hope you like. :)
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Two steps back..
Ugh.. Today was not a good experience. We arrived all chipper ready to hold the kids again and once I got them all situated, Austin kept squirming in my right arm. He was obviously not comfortable but I thought he would adjust. What was really waiting for me was one desat after another. They both decided to have a bad day and it was so frustrating bc I was holding both of them and couldn't do much to adjust them, pull their heads back, etc. Mom just kept trying to help me and we were both overwhelmed.. After about 45 minutes, we gave up. I had to leave the room to take a deep breath. We eventually just went and ate and came back to look at them. It was as if they were super sensitive to my touch today which made me feel sad. I know that every day is different though and they could be going through an important stage today that I can't see. Ii is taking everything in my power not to project into the future when I'm trying to breast feed them at the same time and it just won't work. I have visions of not being able to hold them both.. Anxiety of having two instead of one. Each day seems to bring a new challenge and hopefully tomorrow will go more smoothly.
I have decided to ease into holding them at the same time.. Maybe stick with one at a time for a bit til they get a little bigger.
More tomorrow..
Much love to you,
Erica & Tom
I have decided to ease into holding them at the same time.. Maybe stick with one at a time for a bit til they get a little bigger.
More tomorrow..
Much love to you,
Erica & Tom
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
No oxygen~~! (trial run)
The other amazing thing that happened was that I got to hold them BOTH today skin to skin like I would have had I delivered them naturally. It was the most wonderful feeling to hold both of them at the same time, all snuggled into each other.. much like they were in the womb. Austin immediately dipped his head and leaned into Grace's arm. It was the sweetest thing I have ever seen. :) I got to hold them for more than an hour and the nurses said that I could do that from now on bc they have no wires. That will save me a ton of time each day. .. so relieved!! I only get to hold them once a day and this way, I can maximize my visits..
A very sweet friend came to visit today and it was really fun. She has twin boys that were born at Cedars as well and were in the NICU. It is so nice to have a girlfriend that has been here and knows what it is like. I really want to join the twins club she belongs to so our kids can have playdates together.. when they get a little bigger of course. :) She got us some great little tops with the months on them so we can log each month of their first year. I'll post those pics tomorrow.
Updates
Grace
Her feedings were increased to 34ML and she seems to be handling them well. She lost a few grams but not many.. she is still around 3lbs.15oz.
Austin
His feedings are the same 38ML and he gained a few grams back so he is closer to 4 lbs. 5 ozs. again..
It was a really special day and I am starting to get the excitement factor now.. even though I don't know when they will be coming home, it is still fun to see some light at the end of the tunnel. They ARE improving and that is all that matters!!
Much love to you all,
Erica and Tom
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Ups and downs..
We had a few roller coaster moments today unfortunately, but it all turned out well. Austin had a pretty serious desat and apnea episode and took a while to come back but he's okay. Grace had a desat but slept really well with me for a about an hour and a half. Mom held Austin all swaddled up and loved every second of it. He is so aware these days, opens his eyes and looks around. Grace isn't as controlled with her eyes yet but she'll get there. They both have their eye exams in the morning.. hopefully all is well in that dept.
Updates
Grace
They are going to increase her feedings tomorrow but they did change the amount of time they take to administer the feedings. It is now 30 minutes vs. an hour and she handled it really well. She weighed in today at 1795 grams which is 3lbs. 15oz... almost 4 lbs!
Austin
His feedings were increased to 38ML today and also has the new timing of 30 minutes. He weighed 1890 grams which is 4lbs. 3oz. .. he lost some weight but is still over 4lbs.
Tom was able to leave work early to go and hold the kids for a while and he says they both smiled at him. :) He has really missed them this week after spending every day with them for weeks now. It is nice that his office isn't too far from the hospital so maybe he can do that periodically.
More for you tomorrow.. attaching pictures from the past few days.
Erica & Tom
Updates
Grace
They are going to increase her feedings tomorrow but they did change the amount of time they take to administer the feedings. It is now 30 minutes vs. an hour and she handled it really well. She weighed in today at 1795 grams which is 3lbs. 15oz... almost 4 lbs!
Austin
His feedings were increased to 38ML today and also has the new timing of 30 minutes. He weighed 1890 grams which is 4lbs. 3oz. .. he lost some weight but is still over 4lbs.
Tom was able to leave work early to go and hold the kids for a while and he says they both smiled at him. :) He has really missed them this week after spending every day with them for weeks now. It is nice that his office isn't too far from the hospital so maybe he can do that periodically.
More for you tomorrow.. attaching pictures from the past few days.
Monday, January 23, 2012
Special day for Mimi
Today was really fun.. my mom got to come and see the kids and held Grace for more than an hour. She was all swaddled and sweet and did really well. She only had one brady and recovered quickly. I held Austin for an hour and a half and he crashed although he had a few desats and one brady during our time together. He recovered but it still stressed me out. They had follow up head ultrasounds today and they were normal, yay!
Updates
Austin
He is doing well on his new feeds of 34 ml with no residuals. He was super aware today with open eyes, looking around a ton and looked very cute in his monkey onsie. Great news is that he is 4 lb. 5oz!!! Huge growth spurt apparently.. very exciting!
Grace
She is doing great as well with her new feedings of 32ml. She was super sleepy today and just crashed with Mimi. It was a special day for them, tomorrow will be a date with Austin. :) Grace now weighs 3 lb. 13 oz.and her face is filling out finally.
We received two of the most adorable prayer blankets from a sweet family member so we took them to the hospital today and put them on top of the incubators. We are so thankful for the love and support of family and these blankets will be cherished always!
Tom went back to work today and we missed him so much today. It will be really tough to be away from the kids and I am feeling bad for him. Lots of pictures were taken and I will post tomorrow.
Much love to you all,
Erica and Tom
Updates
Austin
He is doing well on his new feeds of 34 ml with no residuals. He was super aware today with open eyes, looking around a ton and looked very cute in his monkey onsie. Great news is that he is 4 lb. 5oz!!! Huge growth spurt apparently.. very exciting!
Grace
She is doing great as well with her new feedings of 32ml. She was super sleepy today and just crashed with Mimi. It was a special day for them, tomorrow will be a date with Austin. :) Grace now weighs 3 lb. 13 oz.and her face is filling out finally.
We received two of the most adorable prayer blankets from a sweet family member so we took them to the hospital today and put them on top of the incubators. We are so thankful for the love and support of family and these blankets will be cherished always!
Tom went back to work today and we missed him so much today. It will be really tough to be away from the kids and I am feeling bad for him. Lots of pictures were taken and I will post tomorrow.
Much love to you all,
Erica and Tom
Saturday, January 21, 2012
A great day.. Finally!!
Today was a welcomed break from this week's drama. The kids looked great and were perfect!! I got to hold Grace and she slept for two hours snuggled up with me with no d&b's!!! Austin was with Tom today and had no episodes either!! They have minor events throughout the day but they are decreasing in number now. They increased their feedings .. Grace to 32 ml and Austin to 34 ml. They both get their first Hep B vaccinations tomorrow and the doctors are pleased with their progress.. Phew!
Days like today make it all worth doing, knowing that they are improving means the world to us. I took some videos today that I will post ASAP..
Cheers to a good day,
Erica & Tom
Days like today make it all worth doing, knowing that they are improving means the world to us. I took some videos today that I will post ASAP..
Cheers to a good day,
Erica & Tom
Friday, January 20, 2012
Not a great day for Austin. :(
This week just seems to be a rough one and I am hoping that next week gets better. We arrived to find two gorgeous babies all dressed and swaddled, waiting for their parents to hold them. I was really excited to see them and couldn't wait to hold Austin today. Grace was tough yesterday so I was hoping for a smooth ride today. Tom had Grace and she did pretty well.. fell asleep promptly as usual and had a few b&d's during their visit but they weren't bad, she always recovered on her own. I had Austin and we had such a great day yesterday, I thought he would just crash and burn. About 40 minutes into his nap, he had this massive desat, brady and apnea episode all at once. His heart rate went down to 40, his oxygenation went down to 29 and it stayed there for more than a minute. I was holding him so the nurse came over and was giving him oxygen while he was on my chest. He looked so calm and peaceful though and I just kept trying to wake him up. It was a scary minute to say the least and I eagerly volunteered to put him back into his incubator so that he could stabilize quickly. What a nightmare.. I know that these "events" as they call them are getting less and less frequent but it is hard for us to deal with each day. I wish I could be as nonchalant as the nurses are when they happen. In my mind, I am thinking.. he almost died right then! I am soooo glad they are in the NICU and not at home right now. I would never be able to keep them going on my own. So, today I am beyond grateful for the staff and the technology at the NICU and they will be there until these types of things don't happen anymore. Never mind what I will be doing when they are home.. watching them breathe in and out and checking every second to make sure they are alive. That is several months down the road though and we will cross that bridge then.
We met a volunteer today who is a graduate and her daughter is now 5. We were so taken by her willingness to come and speak to parents every other Friday for 4 hours. This journey is not one that is taken lightly and somehow you know that but when you are in your own personal challenge, it seems like we are the only ones with babies struggling to make it.. how wrong could I be? There are 6 bays in that NICU with 8 beds per bay, and there are so many babies with parents in our boat. As time passes we are already trying to think of ways to give back. It seems that we are all in battle together and the scars are shared. The relationships you develop with other parents seem almost instant which is amazing given how emotionally sterile LA can be at times.
We do have some good news to share and that is that the kids have grown..
Updates
Austin
He is so close to being 4 lbs! at 3 lbs. 13 oz. today, I couldn't be more happy because the bigger he is the better!!! Feedings have not changed and probably won't for a while .. his massive event today was from reflux and he ended up spitting some milk out afterwards. I am just glad he didn't aspirate.
We checked his height and he has grown 1/4" since birth and is now 16 1/2".. wow that was fast!
Grace
She is weighing in at 3lbs. 8.9 oz... she has not grown yet but I am sure she will soon. She is still on the same feedings and seems to be handling them really well with no residuals and soft tummy. ;) She keeps trying to pull her feeding tube out and we are shocked at how dexterous she is.. she can lift her head and manages to maneuver her fingers quite effectively.. she is on watch now every time we hold her.. little magician!
I have posted some new pics.. some are from days ago but they were on my camera and not my phone so it's a spattering of shots. Enjoy! The files are big so if you click on them you will go to the pictures themselves and you can see them better.
Much love to you all,
Erica and Tom
We met a volunteer today who is a graduate and her daughter is now 5. We were so taken by her willingness to come and speak to parents every other Friday for 4 hours. This journey is not one that is taken lightly and somehow you know that but when you are in your own personal challenge, it seems like we are the only ones with babies struggling to make it.. how wrong could I be? There are 6 bays in that NICU with 8 beds per bay, and there are so many babies with parents in our boat. As time passes we are already trying to think of ways to give back. It seems that we are all in battle together and the scars are shared. The relationships you develop with other parents seem almost instant which is amazing given how emotionally sterile LA can be at times.
We do have some good news to share and that is that the kids have grown..
Updates
Austin
He is so close to being 4 lbs! at 3 lbs. 13 oz. today, I couldn't be more happy because the bigger he is the better!!! Feedings have not changed and probably won't for a while .. his massive event today was from reflux and he ended up spitting some milk out afterwards. I am just glad he didn't aspirate.
We checked his height and he has grown 1/4" since birth and is now 16 1/2".. wow that was fast!
Grace
She is weighing in at 3lbs. 8.9 oz... she has not grown yet but I am sure she will soon. She is still on the same feedings and seems to be handling them really well with no residuals and soft tummy. ;) She keeps trying to pull her feeding tube out and we are shocked at how dexterous she is.. she can lift her head and manages to maneuver her fingers quite effectively.. she is on watch now every time we hold her.. little magician!
I have posted some new pics.. some are from days ago but they were on my camera and not my phone so it's a spattering of shots. Enjoy! The files are big so if you click on them you will go to the pictures themselves and you can see them better.
Much love to you all,
Mellow.. ish day
We had a fairly uneventful day yesterday. The kids looked pink and chubby ..for the 3 lb. range of course. Austin did great, slept like a log for an hour and a half. Gracie was good for about 45 minutes but then her heart rate spiked to 214! How can a heart that small handle that? I just imagine it being like a little animal, pitter patter pitter patter. Tachycardis is her issue right now but it's episodic so they aren't worried. I worry though. I can't help it.. My poor baby can't regulate her heartbeat and I want to fix it..I just hold her tighter, hoping my heartbeat will influence her. Perils of parenthood.
I keep thinking that when they come home I'll stop worrying so much but as we all know, it will just be the beginning.
I guess Grace lost some grams yesterday but Austin gained. We are on our way to the hospital now so I will check in later with more..sorry for the short post.
Love,
Erica and Tom
I keep thinking that when they come home I'll stop worrying so much but as we all know, it will just be the beginning.
I guess Grace lost some grams yesterday but Austin gained. We are on our way to the hospital now so I will check in later with more..sorry for the short post.
Love,
Erica and Tom
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Roller Coaster Days
I have to keep myself in check .. Tom and I were just discussing how much this situation sucks BUT that it could be so much worse. I distinctly remember how horribly uncomfortable I was during this pregnancy, especially the week before this whole thing went down. Anyone who saw me those last few weeks can attest to my state of mind and physicality. Had I not delivered, I would be laying in a hospital bed just getting bigger. They kept telling me I could make it another six weeks with my water broken.. Fat chance!! As much as I wish I could have made it, I know in my heart this was best. It's just so hard to keep everything in perspective from one day to the next.. One day I'm okay and the next I'm in the twilight zone wondering what just happened. I guess this is what they meant by "roller coaster" at our first family meeting. I have decided to focus on the day to day and not look into the future too far, it's too overwhelming. At least this way we can truly celebrate each daily win, no matter how tiny.
The visits each day are pretty stressful and the time seems to melt through our fingers. Literally, the hours pass in what seems like minutes, very strange. Seeing them is such a treat though even with the desats and Brady's which brings me to the past two days..
Grace was changed to what is called a comfort flow breathing canula. Austin's been on it for a while and it seems to help with the "d & b"s (desats & Brady's). The prongs are bigger though and her nostrils are tiny so she hates it and tries to pull it out all the time. Today she managed to get her feeding tube out while she was sleeping on my chest. I felt something run down my chest and thought she had spit up but no, it was her feeding going all over me. Tom experienced this last week so it was my turn. Austin's day was spent snuggled into Tom's chest, sleeping soundly. Somehow I got all of the d&bs and milk splatter. Grace looked adorable in her little onsie so I didn't hold it against her. ;)
Updates
Grace
She weighs 3lbs. 6.8 oz. and is still at 28 ml. She had a residual of 5ml today but the nurse blew it off. Hopefully that won't get any worse. She has an elevated hr and has for a week now. .. it could be a side effect of the caffeine she is on for her apnea but who knows. I'm sure the coming weeks will tell ..
Austin
He finally got to wear this little outfit my mom got that has a whale on it, precious!! Poor guy, I'm going to dress him up like a doll and he has no say in it. He weighs 3lbs. 11 oz. and is really filling out. He is still at 30ml feedings and seems to be handling it great.
Yesterday was such a different story with no d&b's during our visit but tomorrow is a new day and we are hopeful that we can get small breaks from the rough days.
Much love to you all,
Erica & Tom
The visits each day are pretty stressful and the time seems to melt through our fingers. Literally, the hours pass in what seems like minutes, very strange. Seeing them is such a treat though even with the desats and Brady's which brings me to the past two days..
Grace was changed to what is called a comfort flow breathing canula. Austin's been on it for a while and it seems to help with the "d & b"s (desats & Brady's). The prongs are bigger though and her nostrils are tiny so she hates it and tries to pull it out all the time. Today she managed to get her feeding tube out while she was sleeping on my chest. I felt something run down my chest and thought she had spit up but no, it was her feeding going all over me. Tom experienced this last week so it was my turn. Austin's day was spent snuggled into Tom's chest, sleeping soundly. Somehow I got all of the d&bs and milk splatter. Grace looked adorable in her little onsie so I didn't hold it against her. ;)
Updates
Grace
She weighs 3lbs. 6.8 oz. and is still at 28 ml. She had a residual of 5ml today but the nurse blew it off. Hopefully that won't get any worse. She has an elevated hr and has for a week now. .. it could be a side effect of the caffeine she is on for her apnea but who knows. I'm sure the coming weeks will tell ..
Austin
He finally got to wear this little outfit my mom got that has a whale on it, precious!! Poor guy, I'm going to dress him up like a doll and he has no say in it. He weighs 3lbs. 11 oz. and is really filling out. He is still at 30ml feedings and seems to be handling it great.
Much love to you all,
Erica & Tom
Monday, January 16, 2012
Peaceful day
We came in today to find two perfect little Monkies sleeping, all swaddled and cozy. We took yesterday off bc we were at a cabin in Lake Arrowhead with Tom's family. It was nice to get away, take naps, play cards and spend an entire day and a half with Tommy. We have been at the hospital a lot lately and we needed a short break to rest. We missed the twins so much though and it was wonderful to see them today. I had my standing date with Gracie and got to hold her for an hour and a half! She was such a cuddle bug and still makes her chirping sounds .. Especially when she gets the hiccups. Tom got Austin today and they had a great time. He chirped a few times and slept really well. They aren't having as many Brady's and desats anymore which is wonderful!! Eventually they will grow out of them and we can move the feeding tube to their noses so we can start the sucking and swallowing reflexes. We should start that in the next few weeks. I'm so excited for them to move into a new stage.
Updates
Austin
He is up to 30 ml feedings now and weighs 3 lbs. 8 oz.! He is getting so big and his coloring is changing. The kids are starting to look more alike now which is fun.
Grace
She is up to 28 ml feedings and weighs 3 lbs. 4 oz!! She is catching up quickly to Austin and is looking much more baby like now. For a while there, we were worried that she would always look like a little raisin.
Tomorrow we will bring them clothes to wear so I will take pictures. :)
Much love,
Erica & Tom
Updates
Austin
He is up to 30 ml feedings now and weighs 3 lbs. 8 oz.! He is getting so big and his coloring is changing. The kids are starting to look more alike now which is fun.
Grace
She is up to 28 ml feedings and weighs 3 lbs. 4 oz!! She is catching up quickly to Austin and is looking much more baby like now. For a while there, we were worried that she would always look like a little raisin.
Tomorrow we will bring them clothes to wear so I will take pictures. :)
Much love,
Erica & Tom
Saturday, January 14, 2012
Semi-smooth sailing ;)
Yesterday and today went much better for us thank the Lord! The kids seem to be growing, eating and sleeping more soundly. The nurses turned Grace's incubator so that it is now facing Austin's. So we can now sit together with the kids, much nicer. We have great news about Grace, she is finally at 3 lbs! Austin is 3 lbs 6 oz, getting chubbier by the day.
We got there today and found them wearing little shirts. A new milestone, I get to bring clothes in!! I need to shop bc I have almost no premmie stuff.
We are in the car so I will check in later with more..
Love,
Erica and Tom
We got there today and found them wearing little shirts. A new milestone, I get to bring clothes in!! I need to shop bc I have almost no premmie stuff.
We are in the car so I will check in later with more..
Love,
Erica and Tom
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Three steps forward, two steps back... Three steps forward.
What a roller coaster today was. We walked into the NICU to find a new nurse who immediately told us that Austin wasn't well. She said he hadn't pooped in two days so they were going to give him a suppository, he had thown up this morning and he had a residual of 4 1/2 ml. When it is more than 20%, the doctors are called in to assess the situation. Tom and I about had a heart attack because that means something is seriously wrong with his digestive system, an infection.. One of our worst nightmares. And to top it off, he had an elevated temp of 99.7.
Tom jumped in quickly to say that he had changed Austin's diaper yesterday and he HAD pooped, so the nurse from yesterday had neglected to write it down. One box checked off. We set up for Austin's 11:15 am feeding and I had a Come to Jesus conversation with him as I held him on my chest.. I sang to him and told him how much I love him and that he couldn't have an infection. We were going to work thru his rough morning together and he was going to be just fine. They had added the old 5.5 ml to his new 27. An hour later, we were done with his feeding and all we could do was wait because he had one more chance to get it all down before they called the doctors.
They usually check for residuals right before the next feeding so we waited and waited.. At 2:15, we checked and it was ALL gone! His temp went down bc we took his little hat off and unwrapped his swaddle. 98.8, sweet! Two more boxes checked off. Phew!!! Last but not least, he pooped again and it weighed 38 grams! I think he was just waiting for us today to put on a show.. If this is a precursor to his childhood, we are up a creek for sure.
So, in reality the only hurdle we really needed to deal with today was that his threw up. .. Not that he was getting some kind of scary infection. I'm a little mad at the nurses for dropping the ball and feel so grateful that we were there to interject. We went 360 degrees today emotionally. By the time we got home.. Tom and I walked into our bedroom and went to sleep. It was 4:00 pm. How in the world am I going to do this by myself when Tom goes to work?
Update on Grace ( poor girl got the shaft today)..
Tom snuggled with her for over an hour and she slept really well, no residuals at all, go Gracie!! She's gained a little weight and is up to 2 lbs. 15.7 oz. ;) She had a pretty bad desat today but recovered nicely. Thank you Gracie for not doing anything crazy today!
We just called the hospital and were told that Austin now weighs 3 lbs. 5.4 oz. That is great news, no residuals for either of them since we left, they are sleeping soundly after their baths and now we can put today to rest. More I'm sure tomorrow..
Until then, love to you all..
Erica & Tom
Tom jumped in quickly to say that he had changed Austin's diaper yesterday and he HAD pooped, so the nurse from yesterday had neglected to write it down. One box checked off. We set up for Austin's 11:15 am feeding and I had a Come to Jesus conversation with him as I held him on my chest.. I sang to him and told him how much I love him and that he couldn't have an infection. We were going to work thru his rough morning together and he was going to be just fine. They had added the old 5.5 ml to his new 27. An hour later, we were done with his feeding and all we could do was wait because he had one more chance to get it all down before they called the doctors.
They usually check for residuals right before the next feeding so we waited and waited.. At 2:15, we checked and it was ALL gone! His temp went down bc we took his little hat off and unwrapped his swaddle. 98.8, sweet! Two more boxes checked off. Phew!!! Last but not least, he pooped again and it weighed 38 grams! I think he was just waiting for us today to put on a show.. If this is a precursor to his childhood, we are up a creek for sure.
So, in reality the only hurdle we really needed to deal with today was that his threw up. .. Not that he was getting some kind of scary infection. I'm a little mad at the nurses for dropping the ball and feel so grateful that we were there to interject. We went 360 degrees today emotionally. By the time we got home.. Tom and I walked into our bedroom and went to sleep. It was 4:00 pm. How in the world am I going to do this by myself when Tom goes to work?
Update on Grace ( poor girl got the shaft today)..
Tom snuggled with her for over an hour and she slept really well, no residuals at all, go Gracie!! She's gained a little weight and is up to 2 lbs. 15.7 oz. ;) She had a pretty bad desat today but recovered nicely. Thank you Gracie for not doing anything crazy today!
We just called the hospital and were told that Austin now weighs 3 lbs. 5.4 oz. That is great news, no residuals for either of them since we left, they are sleeping soundly after their baths and now we can put today to rest. More I'm sure tomorrow..
Until then, love to you all..
Erica & Tom
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
A better day.. finally
We got up extra early to go in to the hospital and things went much better today. It was so nice to see them swaddled and peaceful. They haven't been swaddled before today and I think they really liked it. We were able to hold them for an hour each, Tom had Austin and I had Grace and they both did amazing!!! Not one desat or brady the whole time, wooo hooo! It was so comforting to not have to watch the monitors the entire time and just snuggle them.
On a side note, I need to apologize if I get weights mixed up .. I went back and read previous posts and I get all excited about Grace gaining weight when indeed she lost an ounce. I just ask that you all bare with me until I can get everything straight.. Including my brain. :)) I'll do my best to get the most accurate info out there :)
Updates
Grace
She weighed in at 2 lbs. 15 oz. and had no residuals today with her feeding which means she digested all of her food. She has been doing great with her poopies and that is great bc her digestive system is working effectively, need that! She slept so hard today and was holding onto my shirt, precious. I sang to her the entire time and loved every second of it. Grace still looks tiny and wrinkly although very cute. I can't wait for her to gain some more weight. We absolutely adore her though and don't want to put super high expectations on her so early in the journey. She is on her own time table we are noticing..
Austin
He weighed in at 3 lbs. 2 oz.!!! He has finally reached his birth weight, Go Austin Go!!!! His face is changing so much and he is looking more and more like a baby. He had some desats after feeding was complete but that didn't count as far I am concerned. We are so proud of him and his progress.
As you can tell, I am really happy with how today went. Each day is different it seems and we were glad to have a day with less stress. Of course, I promptly went home and ran into our garage with the Mercedes but that is another blog.. my lack of coordination and brain cells after having children. haha
We love you all and look forward to seeing them again tomorrow.
Erica & Tom
On a side note, I need to apologize if I get weights mixed up .. I went back and read previous posts and I get all excited about Grace gaining weight when indeed she lost an ounce. I just ask that you all bare with me until I can get everything straight.. Including my brain. :)) I'll do my best to get the most accurate info out there :)
Updates
Grace
She weighed in at 2 lbs. 15 oz. and had no residuals today with her feeding which means she digested all of her food. She has been doing great with her poopies and that is great bc her digestive system is working effectively, need that! She slept so hard today and was holding onto my shirt, precious. I sang to her the entire time and loved every second of it. Grace still looks tiny and wrinkly although very cute. I can't wait for her to gain some more weight. We absolutely adore her though and don't want to put super high expectations on her so early in the journey. She is on her own time table we are noticing..
Austin
He weighed in at 3 lbs. 2 oz.!!! He has finally reached his birth weight, Go Austin Go!!!! His face is changing so much and he is looking more and more like a baby. He had some desats after feeding was complete but that didn't count as far I am concerned. We are so proud of him and his progress.
As you can tell, I am really happy with how today went. Each day is different it seems and we were glad to have a day with less stress. Of course, I promptly went home and ran into our garage with the Mercedes but that is another blog.. my lack of coordination and brain cells after having children. haha
We love you all and look forward to seeing them again tomorrow.
Erica & Tom
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
We are batting 1000...
We didn't get to go to the hospital today which was such a disappointment but it was for good reason. Tom got food poisoning yesterday and we were in the ER until 2:30am. We weren't sure if it was a stomach flu or not so we couldn't take the risk. I'm happy to report that I have not gotten it and we will be there bright and early tomorrow. Tom is feeling much better too, thank God! It was another rough night in a hospital but we switched places this time.
We called the hospital a lot today and the kids are doing well. They are still off the lights and still having bradies and desats pretty consistently.
Updates
Austin
He weighed in at 3 lbs. 1 oz. today which is up.. Again. :) His feedings are the same at 27 ml. They are still giving him time to learn how to eat this much which makes me happy. I know they need to push them, but sometimes it's scary. He seems to breathe and eat better when he's on his tummy so they have been putting his little legs underneath his body, so sweet! They digest better when we hold them though.. So we will try doing that more and more as we are allowed to.. One day away from him feels like a month!
Grace
She weighed in today at 2 lbs. 13 oz. .. Woo hoo! It always seems that they gain weight when we go and hold them, so yesterday must have worked. Hopefully she will get to three pounds very soon. Other news is that Grace had some residuals today, 5 ml.. Which is more than usual but they still increased her feedings to 24 ml. She also does better on her tummy and it's hilarious when she slides down the bed into a little crumple .. Her tiny diaper booty hangs out the end of her sheets and you can barely see her face. I will try a get a shot of it soon.
Sorry for the short entry tonight, I'm sure I will have more today tomorrow.
Love to all of you,
Erica & Tom
We called the hospital a lot today and the kids are doing well. They are still off the lights and still having bradies and desats pretty consistently.
Updates
Austin
He weighed in at 3 lbs. 1 oz. today which is up.. Again. :) His feedings are the same at 27 ml. They are still giving him time to learn how to eat this much which makes me happy. I know they need to push them, but sometimes it's scary. He seems to breathe and eat better when he's on his tummy so they have been putting his little legs underneath his body, so sweet! They digest better when we hold them though.. So we will try doing that more and more as we are allowed to.. One day away from him feels like a month!
Grace
She weighed in today at 2 lbs. 13 oz. .. Woo hoo! It always seems that they gain weight when we go and hold them, so yesterday must have worked. Hopefully she will get to three pounds very soon. Other news is that Grace had some residuals today, 5 ml.. Which is more than usual but they still increased her feedings to 24 ml. She also does better on her tummy and it's hilarious when she slides down the bed into a little crumple .. Her tiny diaper booty hangs out the end of her sheets and you can barely see her face. I will try a get a shot of it soon.
Sorry for the short entry tonight, I'm sure I will have more today tomorrow.
Love to all of you,
Erica & Tom
Monday, January 9, 2012
Some set backs but we are TWO weeks in!
Today was a little rough although I hate to admit it. I had to go in by myself which is always a bit lonely.. Tom has been taking antibiotics for a cold and hasn't been able to come with me for a few days. Things started looking up when my friend, Andrea decided to come by. She came and stayed with me for a few hours and we were able to catch up and she could see the kids for the first time. I loved it and it was just what the doctor ordered.
What was hard about today was hearing that Austin had a bad morning. He had a spell of apnea with color change which essentially means he wasn't breathing well at all this morning and it was so much so that he changed color. This is a first for him so they scheduled a chest xray which ultimately showed nothing. They also checked his white blood cell count and it was normal, phew!! He has fluid in his lungs which is to be expected however if it continues, they will need to put him on a diuretic to get rid of it. Grace was having some trouble today too which is just so stressful. I was able to hold each of them for an hour but spent the majority of it watching the monitors, waiting for the alarms to go off (which was quite frequent) and then breathing out when they came back up. I have to admit that it is exhausting and I just wish that I could push fast forward through the next few weeks when they are so truly fragile. I know in my heart that this too shall pass and that God is watching over us.. again, I have to remind myself that I can only control what I can control, the rest is up to Him. And I need to be stronger for them.. they need me more than ever right now.
On a lighter note, I have some really cute pictures that Andrea took. Other good news is that the kids are officially 2 weeks old! I am so proud of them and I know they are fighting very hard. I absolutely loved holding them and having some snuggle time. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day for them.
Updates
Grace
She loves to hold my finger when we snuggle and her skin is getting more fair. They are off the lights for billirubin and that is great news! She is breathing forced room air with a little bit of extra oxygen when handled. She is tolerating her feedings well for the most part, They have decided to hold off on increasing the amount until she can learn how to breathe better during her meals. She has lost a little bit of weight and is down to around 2lbs. 14 oz. which is still above her birth weight. Yay!
Austin
He also loves finger holding while snuggling except he gets so comfortable, he crashes and then forgets to breathe. No Austin No! He is getting such a spanking when he is big enough..He is staying around 27ML for now as well.. just giving him some time to learn as well. He has lost some weight too and is around the same as Grace now, 2lbs. 15 oz. which is below his birth weight of 3lbs. 2 oz. but we will work on that. He is getting a little more oxygen than Grace at this point and will continue to until he shows improvement. And don't laugh at the second picture, he looks like a little monkey but it was because he was all red. haha
Much love to you all,
Erica & Tom
What was hard about today was hearing that Austin had a bad morning. He had a spell of apnea with color change which essentially means he wasn't breathing well at all this morning and it was so much so that he changed color. This is a first for him so they scheduled a chest xray which ultimately showed nothing. They also checked his white blood cell count and it was normal, phew!! He has fluid in his lungs which is to be expected however if it continues, they will need to put him on a diuretic to get rid of it. Grace was having some trouble today too which is just so stressful. I was able to hold each of them for an hour but spent the majority of it watching the monitors, waiting for the alarms to go off (which was quite frequent) and then breathing out when they came back up. I have to admit that it is exhausting and I just wish that I could push fast forward through the next few weeks when they are so truly fragile. I know in my heart that this too shall pass and that God is watching over us.. again, I have to remind myself that I can only control what I can control, the rest is up to Him. And I need to be stronger for them.. they need me more than ever right now.
On a lighter note, I have some really cute pictures that Andrea took. Other good news is that the kids are officially 2 weeks old! I am so proud of them and I know they are fighting very hard. I absolutely loved holding them and having some snuggle time. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day for them.
Updates
Grace
She loves to hold my finger when we snuggle and her skin is getting more fair. They are off the lights for billirubin and that is great news! She is breathing forced room air with a little bit of extra oxygen when handled. She is tolerating her feedings well for the most part, They have decided to hold off on increasing the amount until she can learn how to breathe better during her meals. She has lost a little bit of weight and is down to around 2lbs. 14 oz. which is still above her birth weight. Yay!
Austin
He also loves finger holding while snuggling except he gets so comfortable, he crashes and then forgets to breathe. No Austin No! He is getting such a spanking when he is big enough..He is staying around 27ML for now as well.. just giving him some time to learn as well. He has lost some weight too and is around the same as Grace now, 2lbs. 15 oz. which is below his birth weight of 3lbs. 2 oz. but we will work on that. He is getting a little more oxygen than Grace at this point and will continue to until he shows improvement. And don't laugh at the second picture, he looks like a little monkey but it was because he was all red. haha
Much love to you all,
Saturday, January 7, 2012
No more IVs!!! .. for now..
I have a lot to share from the past few days so here goes..
We had our family meeting with the doctors and were able to discuss next steps and goals for the future. They said that the main focus right now is to gain weight and watch their feedings increase. They just need some time to grow before new milestones are reached. The great news is that they said that if they were to look at healthy 28 week twins, Austin and Grace would be them. They are right where they should be and even though we have a lot of ifs, they are on target for their age. The bradies and desats will resolve on their own as 95% of kids with these issues do. We will start working on the sucking and swallowing reflexes at 34 weeks but over the next several weeks, we will start to try breastfeeding and bottle feeding as practice. We will do another follow up ultrasound on their heads before they go home as well as eye exams. Apparently eyes develop predominantly between 36-40 weeks. It was comforting to ask our questions and feel supported by them.
Updates:
Grace
She is weighing in at 2 lbs. 12 oz.s and is really close to 13 oz.s (woo hoo!!) and her feedings have been increased to 23ML! She has some residual which is when she doesn't digest all of her food but they aren't worried about it. She still loves to be on her tummy. The picture I attached was her sleeping today, so soundly.. she looks like she has spot lights on her already. :)
Austin
He is weighing in at 3 lbs. 1 oz., just 1 oz. away from his birth weight. His feedings have been increased to 27ML and he has no residuals which is great. He was showing his Hanson today when he was sleeping .. he has double jointed arms and was on his side with his palm up. I know that is hard to imagine but it was really funny when I saw it and the nurses were perplexed but thought it was funny too. You can see in his picture.. and don't tell Austin that his sunglasses are pink! that is the only color they have..
Our house has been dealing with some illness lately with Tommy on antibiotics for a cough and now Tom is on a Zpack for a cold.. I was the only person at the NICU today. It was strange and bit lonely to go alone. All I could think about was that this will be my life for the next few months and it was humbling. .. learning how to feed them and care for them over the next several weeks will be a journey unto itself.. but I am ready. When Tom is at work, I will be there doing my work. I have never felt more inspired and driven to get something done in my life. These kids will be okay if I have anything to do with it! :) I know Tom feels the same way and I am so grateful to have him as my partner.
Love to all of you,
Erica & Tom
We had our family meeting with the doctors and were able to discuss next steps and goals for the future. They said that the main focus right now is to gain weight and watch their feedings increase. They just need some time to grow before new milestones are reached. The great news is that they said that if they were to look at healthy 28 week twins, Austin and Grace would be them. They are right where they should be and even though we have a lot of ifs, they are on target for their age. The bradies and desats will resolve on their own as 95% of kids with these issues do. We will start working on the sucking and swallowing reflexes at 34 weeks but over the next several weeks, we will start to try breastfeeding and bottle feeding as practice. We will do another follow up ultrasound on their heads before they go home as well as eye exams. Apparently eyes develop predominantly between 36-40 weeks. It was comforting to ask our questions and feel supported by them.
Updates:
Grace
She is weighing in at 2 lbs. 12 oz.s and is really close to 13 oz.s (woo hoo!!) and her feedings have been increased to 23ML! She has some residual which is when she doesn't digest all of her food but they aren't worried about it. She still loves to be on her tummy. The picture I attached was her sleeping today, so soundly.. she looks like she has spot lights on her already. :)
Austin
He is weighing in at 3 lbs. 1 oz., just 1 oz. away from his birth weight. His feedings have been increased to 27ML and he has no residuals which is great. He was showing his Hanson today when he was sleeping .. he has double jointed arms and was on his side with his palm up. I know that is hard to imagine but it was really funny when I saw it and the nurses were perplexed but thought it was funny too. You can see in his picture.. and don't tell Austin that his sunglasses are pink! that is the only color they have..
Our house has been dealing with some illness lately with Tommy on antibiotics for a cough and now Tom is on a Zpack for a cold.. I was the only person at the NICU today. It was strange and bit lonely to go alone. All I could think about was that this will be my life for the next few months and it was humbling. .. learning how to feed them and care for them over the next several weeks will be a journey unto itself.. but I am ready. When Tom is at work, I will be there doing my work. I have never felt more inspired and driven to get something done in my life. These kids will be okay if I have anything to do with it! :) I know Tom feels the same way and I am so grateful to have him as my partner.
Love to all of you,
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Good news we hope..
We have been talking more and more about the heart valve issue and they said that even if the valves in their hearts (that helps oxygenate their blood) are not closed, they won't do anything about it for a while. They are doing well for their age and they are going to wait to make any decisions or even check it.
Updates:
Austin
He is back on the lights bc his bilirubin went back up to 8 I think.. ugh. Oh well, they said that would happen. A few days on and few days off. We are just glad that they aren't seeming to get burned by the lights anymore. Both of them were so dry around their mouths, they had little cracks and bled (when they were a few day old). He is up to 24 ML feeding, Yay! and still weighs 3 lbs. He is so close to 3.2, his birth weight. We will do a jig when he finally hits it. Good news for the day is that they are planning to take his pick line out in the next few days. That is his feeding IV that goes up his arm and close to his heart. He has to keep his arm straight to not kink it and when you are as little as he is, it makes it hard to live up to those expectations.. hence the alarms go off. I swear there is an alarm for everything, you can't keep them all straight.
Grace
Our little Princess is also back on the lights for her bilirubin. I think they talk to each other regularly bc they pull the same stuff on us each day. She is copying Austin I think.. She is up to 20 ML feeding and has not gained weight.. steady at her svelte 2 lb. 11oz. - we call her our little supermodel. She is so long and skinny, she is already looking for designers to hire her. Grace also got good news about her pick line and it will be taken out shortly as well. They will be fortifying my breast milk to take the place of what they are getting via IV.. it's like a baby protein shake they said.
I am posting some photos finally.. we have waited because they looked so scary with all of the wires coming off of them but now they have more of a baby look so we felt more comfortable. Enjoy!
Much love,
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
A better day..
Today was really nice.. We spent the whole day at the hospital and was able to get some really great time with the kids. We held each of them for an hour and I got Austin today. He was asleep before he could snuggle into my top.. So precious and tiny he is. It is so strange for something so little to crawl into the nape of your neck like a squirrel and sleep, and it's your child. I will never forget this time and how perfect they both are yet so small.
Tom had Grace and she was giving him some attitude at first but settled in quickly. She makes this little sound that is like a baby animal that is high pitched like a bird, and she hiccups outloud in the same voice. It makes us laugh so hard. I hope she keeps doing it when she is bigger. I kept falling asleep with Austin which tells me I need to nap more during the day.
We waited too long to eat and my blood sugar got a little low, won't do that again. My body is still recovering, I have to remember that. Cousin Kirsten came to visit and had lunch with us and got to see the kids. It was so nice to share some time together and catch her up. It was a more mellow day for us which was welcomed after the crisis we have been living in since the 19th.
Updates:
Austin
He had gotten an A for the day with almost no Brady's ( I have no idea how to spell that so please bare with me). Right before we left, he had a big one that scared us but he recovered nicely after a minute or so. Again, can't wait for that to stop. He weighs 3 lbs!!!! And is up to 21 Mls at his feedings. We are so proud of his progress! Something cute is that he has my hands, long fingers ... And Tom's feet. :)
Grace
She honestly looked like a doll today, so sweet! She had one desat today but that is amazing considering she had 13 in one day just a few days ago. She is holding steady at 2 lbs 11 oz. and her feedings are up to 17 ml which is handling really well. She has my feet for sure bc she can spread her toes! I love it!!
Cheers to another day at the NICU.. One week down, 9+ to go.
Love and hugs,
Erica & Tom
P.S. I promise to add pictures tomorrow!!
Tom had Grace and she was giving him some attitude at first but settled in quickly. She makes this little sound that is like a baby animal that is high pitched like a bird, and she hiccups outloud in the same voice. It makes us laugh so hard. I hope she keeps doing it when she is bigger. I kept falling asleep with Austin which tells me I need to nap more during the day.
We waited too long to eat and my blood sugar got a little low, won't do that again. My body is still recovering, I have to remember that. Cousin Kirsten came to visit and had lunch with us and got to see the kids. It was so nice to share some time together and catch her up. It was a more mellow day for us which was welcomed after the crisis we have been living in since the 19th.
Updates:
Austin
He had gotten an A for the day with almost no Brady's ( I have no idea how to spell that so please bare with me). Right before we left, he had a big one that scared us but he recovered nicely after a minute or so. Again, can't wait for that to stop. He weighs 3 lbs!!!! And is up to 21 Mls at his feedings. We are so proud of his progress! Something cute is that he has my hands, long fingers ... And Tom's feet. :)
Grace
She honestly looked like a doll today, so sweet! She had one desat today but that is amazing considering she had 13 in one day just a few days ago. She is holding steady at 2 lbs 11 oz. and her feedings are up to 17 ml which is handling really well. She has my feet for sure bc she can spread her toes! I love it!!
Cheers to another day at the NICU.. One week down, 9+ to go.
Love and hugs,
Erica & Tom
P.S. I promise to add pictures tomorrow!!
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Our first hurdles
Today went well but we didn't get to hold them. I was just excited to see them given we weren't able to yesterday. T3 seems to be getting better and we aren't showing signs of getting his cold so hopefully tomorrow we can snuggle.
We unfortunately had some more setbacks. They went back on oxygen today. ;( We had hoped that we would bypass this part bc they were breathing so well on their own, but they both had increased desats and bradies (forget to breathe and oxygen saturation decreases) that needed more and more stimulation to get through. We were both so sad but when we saw them today, they seemed more peaceful.. Well kind of. Now that i think about it, Grace was throwing her arms in the air and arching her back in protest of the nasal canula .. It kept falling out.
Austin was doing pretty well with it although he has some other issues. We found out today that he has a small cyst in his head and his carbon dioxide levels are elevated. They said not to worry about the cyst but we are watching the co2 closely. They still haven't ruled out a heart value possibly not closing but we will cross that bridge later.
I know that when this whole thing happened the doctors said it would be an up and down path with a few steps forward and a few back, it's just hard to hear news like that and not fret. For the most part, they are doing great.. Again, considering that they should still be in my ute for 9 to 10 more weeks they are doing great!
On a more positive note, they are tolerating their feedings well and the doctors have decided to slowdown on the rate that they increase their milk and how long they give them to complete it. Our nurse today said that she was happy to see them slowing things down, and not having such high expectations of them.
Updates:
Grace
She weighs 2 lbs 11 oz. she's at her birth weight! Go Gracie go! Her face is changing so much each day and it is fun to see her spunky personality shining thru. I think she will be our wild child .. She honestly has a mind of her own.. Already!! She is up to 14ml feeding and loves to be on her tummy while holding her binky. She reminds Tom and I of Maggie from the Simpsons with how much she sucks on her paci, very cute.
Austin
He weighs 2 lbs. 15 oz. and was born at 3.2 so he close as well. They are neck and neck.. He looked bigger and stronger today with his cute pink skin and sweet little face. He is more mellow and I am so surprised because he was always up to no good in the ute. He ruled the roost in there and needs to step it up to beat out Gracie for the alpha position. He is so precious though, I can't stand it!
So.. Today was ok, we aren't out of the woods according to the neonatologist but we can sleep tonight knowing they are in good hands and we can see them tomorrow.
XOXOXO
Erica and Tom
We unfortunately had some more setbacks. They went back on oxygen today. ;( We had hoped that we would bypass this part bc they were breathing so well on their own, but they both had increased desats and bradies (forget to breathe and oxygen saturation decreases) that needed more and more stimulation to get through. We were both so sad but when we saw them today, they seemed more peaceful.. Well kind of. Now that i think about it, Grace was throwing her arms in the air and arching her back in protest of the nasal canula .. It kept falling out.
Austin was doing pretty well with it although he has some other issues. We found out today that he has a small cyst in his head and his carbon dioxide levels are elevated. They said not to worry about the cyst but we are watching the co2 closely. They still haven't ruled out a heart value possibly not closing but we will cross that bridge later.
I know that when this whole thing happened the doctors said it would be an up and down path with a few steps forward and a few back, it's just hard to hear news like that and not fret. For the most part, they are doing great.. Again, considering that they should still be in my ute for 9 to 10 more weeks they are doing great!
On a more positive note, they are tolerating their feedings well and the doctors have decided to slowdown on the rate that they increase their milk and how long they give them to complete it. Our nurse today said that she was happy to see them slowing things down, and not having such high expectations of them.
Updates:
Grace
She weighs 2 lbs 11 oz. she's at her birth weight! Go Gracie go! Her face is changing so much each day and it is fun to see her spunky personality shining thru. I think she will be our wild child .. She honestly has a mind of her own.. Already!! She is up to 14ml feeding and loves to be on her tummy while holding her binky. She reminds Tom and I of Maggie from the Simpsons with how much she sucks on her paci, very cute.
Austin
He weighs 2 lbs. 15 oz. and was born at 3.2 so he close as well. They are neck and neck.. He looked bigger and stronger today with his cute pink skin and sweet little face. He is more mellow and I am so surprised because he was always up to no good in the ute. He ruled the roost in there and needs to step it up to beat out Gracie for the alpha position. He is so precious though, I can't stand it!
So.. Today was ok, we aren't out of the woods according to the neonatologist but we can sleep tonight knowing they are in good hands and we can see them tomorrow.
XOXOXO
Erica and Tom
Monday, January 2, 2012
a little set back ..
We are dealing with a potential set back as T3 has come down with some sort of coughing cold .. no fever, but it is not safe for us to go visit the kids if he has something. Neither Tom nor I feel bad or have the cough but we took him to the doctor anyway. He seems to have a virus and we are going to see how we all feel tomorrow before we go. Masks and gowns might work.. I don't think I can stand to be away from them another day so that might be our plan. It feels so selfish though that we would go just because we miss them .. it is high time for us to set ourselves and our own needs aside and put their health and well being at the very top of our list. I think we have been doing well so far, but this one is so hard! Our hearts ache..
My mom and dad have decided to leave tomorrow which makes me so sad.. They have been invaluable to this journey thus far and the fact that they are leaving means that we are moving into the next stage of this experience. .. the long haul. God help us! There are no words to explain how grateful I am to them for coming at a moments notice, dropping everything and enduring that past two weeks willingly and graciously. They both need a good rest, a strong cocktail and some blood pressure medicine!!
Updates:
We talked to the NICU today several times and found out that Grace is up to 14ml feeding now which is so great and Austin is at 18ml! I am so proud of them both.. AND the tech said that their brain ultrasounds looked "unremarkable" - HUGE sigh of relief. This means that they haven't had any bleeding in their brains thus far. We were really sweating that one and feel soooo blessed that we got even that preliminary news. It's not official yet, but good enough so that we can sleep tonight. They have both gained weight as well and are close to their birth weights, another milestone. The only hitch we are dealing with is that they keep having decels and brady's which is when they forget to breathe.. I can't wait for that to pass which will be around 34 weeks. It is so scary when the alarm goes off, ugh.. We are told that this is very common in babies their age and size but you never get used to it.
All in all, things are going well and I can't wait to hold them again. More details tomorrow I am sure.
Love and hugs,
Erica and Tom
My mom and dad have decided to leave tomorrow which makes me so sad.. They have been invaluable to this journey thus far and the fact that they are leaving means that we are moving into the next stage of this experience. .. the long haul. God help us! There are no words to explain how grateful I am to them for coming at a moments notice, dropping everything and enduring that past two weeks willingly and graciously. They both need a good rest, a strong cocktail and some blood pressure medicine!!
Updates:
We talked to the NICU today several times and found out that Grace is up to 14ml feeding now which is so great and Austin is at 18ml! I am so proud of them both.. AND the tech said that their brain ultrasounds looked "unremarkable" - HUGE sigh of relief. This means that they haven't had any bleeding in their brains thus far. We were really sweating that one and feel soooo blessed that we got even that preliminary news. It's not official yet, but good enough so that we can sleep tonight. They have both gained weight as well and are close to their birth weights, another milestone. The only hitch we are dealing with is that they keep having decels and brady's which is when they forget to breathe.. I can't wait for that to pass which will be around 34 weeks. It is so scary when the alarm goes off, ugh.. We are told that this is very common in babies their age and size but you never get used to it.
All in all, things are going well and I can't wait to hold them again. More details tomorrow I am sure.
Love and hugs,
Erica and Tom
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Wow how things change quickly..
Getting up to speed.. from Day 5
As of two weeks ago, everything changed with my pregnancy.. I started having contractions that were several minutes apart at home and when I called the doctor, she suggested we go to the hospital. At 11pm with a 2 year old in bed.. let's just say that was not what we wanted to hear. We showed up at Cedars thinking that it was a false alarm and we would be going home that night. I packed nothing, and was ill prepared for what came next. My cervix was dialated 1cm and then Austin started doing something strange. His heart rate kept dropping like he was playing with his umbilical cord. That continued for 24 hours and it was not the easiest experience because they starved me all day long.. thinking that I was going back at any minute for an emergency c-section. They put me on magnesium, gave me steriod shots, the works.. and I was able to stay in that state for several days. Essentially I was in labor for 5 days straight off and on and given that I had a planned c-section before, this was not a comfortable moment.. for any of us.
On Christmas Day, not only did my contractions come back ten fold but my water broke on Grace's side. We thought that I could make it a few more weeks but I developed an infection that gave me a fever, my cervix thinned to 1.9 and apparently Grace started moving down so low that her feet were in my birth canal. They rushed me into surgery and I delivered my two precious babies that day at 5:31pm and 5:32 pm. Grace came first and weighed in at 2.11 lbs. Austin weighed 3.2 and they are now both in the NICU for 10-12 weeks. It is so surreal and heart wrenching at the same time. As of today, they are 7 days old. Our hearts are with them and we will continue to visit them each day and hold them as much as possible.
Some updates from the past few days..
Grace
She has dark hair and olive looking skin but it changes when her bilirubin is lower. She has been breathing open air for most of the past 7 days, sHe lost several ounces at first but she's gained weight to 2.10, has a cute dimple on her right cheek, she's sassy and loves her little knit cap and being swaddled in heart fabric bunting. She is the smaller of the two by 1/4 inch but they are close in size now. She's increased her feedings from 1.5 to 3 to 5ml, then from 8ml to 11ml .. yay!! We are shooting for 23ml so she is half way there.
Austin
He has light hair and fair skin like me (Erica) but also changes with the lamps, so they could switch hair and skin color before they get out. He's been breathing open air for seven days as well but his weight is fluctuating a lot. He went from 3.2 down to 2.9 and has stayed there until today. He is now 2.12 1/2 and hopefully will be back at his birth weight soon. He is eating more than Grace and started at 2 ml and then 5 then 8ml. Today he started on 15ml so that is great news. He loves snuggling and literally crawled up my chest yesterday to get right under my chin, so sweet. He was born at 16 1/4" and Grace at 16" ... Hopefully they both will grow quickly.
Tom has been amazing throughout the entire process and we love visting them together in the NICU. It helps so much to have each other to lean on. Of cource trying to balance our time with Tommy is a challenge but we think it is going well so far. Over time, we will have a schedule in place that will be beneficial to all of us.
I will keep this blog for updates on the kids from now on.. I know everyone wants to know how they are doing so hopefully this will be a good place to come for that.
Love to all of you!!
Erica (& Tom )
As of two weeks ago, everything changed with my pregnancy.. I started having contractions that were several minutes apart at home and when I called the doctor, she suggested we go to the hospital. At 11pm with a 2 year old in bed.. let's just say that was not what we wanted to hear. We showed up at Cedars thinking that it was a false alarm and we would be going home that night. I packed nothing, and was ill prepared for what came next. My cervix was dialated 1cm and then Austin started doing something strange. His heart rate kept dropping like he was playing with his umbilical cord. That continued for 24 hours and it was not the easiest experience because they starved me all day long.. thinking that I was going back at any minute for an emergency c-section. They put me on magnesium, gave me steriod shots, the works.. and I was able to stay in that state for several days. Essentially I was in labor for 5 days straight off and on and given that I had a planned c-section before, this was not a comfortable moment.. for any of us.
On Christmas Day, not only did my contractions come back ten fold but my water broke on Grace's side. We thought that I could make it a few more weeks but I developed an infection that gave me a fever, my cervix thinned to 1.9 and apparently Grace started moving down so low that her feet were in my birth canal. They rushed me into surgery and I delivered my two precious babies that day at 5:31pm and 5:32 pm. Grace came first and weighed in at 2.11 lbs. Austin weighed 3.2 and they are now both in the NICU for 10-12 weeks. It is so surreal and heart wrenching at the same time. As of today, they are 7 days old. Our hearts are with them and we will continue to visit them each day and hold them as much as possible.
Some updates from the past few days..
Grace
She has dark hair and olive looking skin but it changes when her bilirubin is lower. She has been breathing open air for most of the past 7 days, sHe lost several ounces at first but she's gained weight to 2.10, has a cute dimple on her right cheek, she's sassy and loves her little knit cap and being swaddled in heart fabric bunting. She is the smaller of the two by 1/4 inch but they are close in size now. She's increased her feedings from 1.5 to 3 to 5ml, then from 8ml to 11ml .. yay!! We are shooting for 23ml so she is half way there.
Austin
He has light hair and fair skin like me (Erica) but also changes with the lamps, so they could switch hair and skin color before they get out. He's been breathing open air for seven days as well but his weight is fluctuating a lot. He went from 3.2 down to 2.9 and has stayed there until today. He is now 2.12 1/2 and hopefully will be back at his birth weight soon. He is eating more than Grace and started at 2 ml and then 5 then 8ml. Today he started on 15ml so that is great news. He loves snuggling and literally crawled up my chest yesterday to get right under my chin, so sweet. He was born at 16 1/4" and Grace at 16" ... Hopefully they both will grow quickly.
Tom has been amazing throughout the entire process and we love visting them together in the NICU. It helps so much to have each other to lean on. Of cource trying to balance our time with Tommy is a challenge but we think it is going well so far. Over time, we will have a schedule in place that will be beneficial to all of us.
I will keep this blog for updates on the kids from now on.. I know everyone wants to know how they are doing so hopefully this will be a good place to come for that.
Love to all of you!!
Erica (& Tom )
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